I told you I wanted my childhood back so you took me to a playground in the middle of the night to smoke cigarettes until my throat got sore and I told you all I wanted to do was sleep without nightmares so you got me so drunk I passed out and slept through the night in your bed and woke up naked with no idea why and I told you I was feeling numb so you clutched your hand between my ribs, stole my heart, shattered everything single one of them, planted butterflies in my stomach that ate me from the inside out and burned your picture on the inside of my eyelids and I told you I was thirsty so you spit poison down
my throat and I told you I was hungry so you gave me pills that only costed my dignity and I told you I was worried sick about a paper I had to do about any topic that I wanted so you took me out into the night and showed me the darkest spots and taught me the constellations in your eyes and the poetry in your heart and told me to
write about love and we watched the sunset and I never made it home in time to write anything even though I knew it now and I told you I was tired of washing blood from the inside of my shorts and pants so you bought me a sleeveless dress that I never got to wear because we never made it to the summer and now it’s just a sick reminder of how I thought you were saving me but the truth is I was lost in darkness and you were the light at the end of the tunnel but maybe there were better exits that didn’t flick and drowned me in black, lost hopes and sadness. now the only light is from the tip of my cigarette and the beautiful dress I set on fire.
I thought you were saving me // I should be better now (via darling-see-you-in-hell)